Rammstein Implicated in Baltimore School Shooting

Gladden's official mug shot/Baltimore County Police

This isn’t the first time an eccentric hard rock band has been handcuffed in connection to a negative incident and it certainly won’t be the last. Marilyn Manson was blamed for Columbine, a few weeks ago CNN revealed thrash band Hatebreed run on White Power and I’m pretty sure Led Zeppelin is the cause of global warming. Play their records backwards – you’ll see.

Reveling in the good old fashioned notion of rock ‘n roll is the devil, the New York Daily News has implicated theatrical German metal band Rammstein in connection to a Baltimore school shooting, continually pressing the fact that the suspect was an “obsessed” fan.

Being the pinnacle of journalistic integrity that they are, the paper apparently got most of their information on the suspect, 15 year old Bobby Gladden, from his profile on the highly credible social media site Facebook.

For those of you who are unaware of the initial incident, the troubled high school student and probable cancer of society Gladden was arrested yesterday, August 28, and charged with attempted first degree murder and first degree assault for critically injuring fellow classmate Daniel Borowy with a shotgun blast in the lunchroom of Perry Hall High in Baltimore.

Gladden was quickly taken down by school guidance counselor Jesse Wasmer before he could fire off a third shot. Police arrested him promptly at the scene.

As the Daily News puts it, Gladden is described as "a misfit obsessed with a German metal band and the murderous Charles Manson Family.”

"We are horrified,” read a statement released by the surprised as usual family of the suspect. “We did not see this coming and our thoughts and prayers are with the victim and the victim's family."

Given the benefit of the doubt, the family probably didn’t see it coming, but maybe someone should have checked out Gladden’s Facebook page a bit sooner seeing as how his status the morning of the incident read, “first day of school … last day of my life. [expletive deleted] the world.” He even had the cool handle ‘SuicidalSmile’ to boot.

The New York Daily News went on to name a few more of Gladden’s favorite bands which read more like a checklist of society’s usual hard rock scapegoats such as Slipknot and the number one stunner, Marilyn Manson.

A horrific and callous act, regardless of the cause, but maybe instead of playing that old metal blame game they should try asking how – according to Baltimore County Police – a 15 year old got his hands on a shotgun, 21 rounds of ammunition AND a bottle of vodka.

Actually, never mind, it was probably just Rammstein and the Super Devil yet again. But in all seriousness, we should all be glad no one lost their life in yet another all too common school shooting.


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