Being in a band is really fun and satisfying for talented band members and musicians. For a band to be effective, there needs to be understanding, cooperation and coordination among the band members. Unpleasant and negative comments are unwelcome. Here are five things that bandmates should never say to each other.  

1. "You're Doing It Wrong."

Musician and band members have a vision of a perfect song in their mind.It can be a frustration if a few of the band members are getting it off, spoiling the flow. People learn things at different paces and forcing a bandmate to learn at your own pace or someone elses can send them out of the band. Instead of telling someone that they are getting it wrong, try something like: "I like your way of playing stanza four, it comes out nice. It, however, sounds different. Can you kindly try it out this way..."  

2. "I know we have practice in an hour, but I have to attend to a party." (Or some other lame excuses)

Being in a band calls for determination, persistence and patience. Being always available for practices is paramount for the perfection of the band. Having a band practice without a member means they will have to spend some time during next practice session to bring the absent member up to speed.  

3. "You have to do it this way."

Most band members make this mistake quite often. In an effort to help a bandmate, members should always seek to avoid being to controlling over what they expect from others. A band leader should, for example, say something like: "I would prefer if you did play solo at point X rather than Y. Do you mind if we give it a try?"Such a way of suggesting is well acceptable and does not sound dictative at all.  

4. "I think we should replace you."

Its true that some band members may perform way too below the expectations of the band. This, however, is not enough reason to utter such a comment to a bandmate. The bandmate may be showing up late for practices, lacks the skill and talent or even shows up drunk. It is inappropriate to use replacement threats as a warning to such a person.A bandmate who lacks talent and skill, for example, needs all the support they can get to catch up with the more talented members.  

5. "I can not do that part."

Band music is all about cooperation and sharing of the different parts of the song. If a band member declines their part, it could spell doom for the entire song or worse still the entire band. It is clear that a band member is not always okay with all parts and components of the song. If a member is given such a part, say a drummer is given the guitar, they should not decline entirely but request to play what they are comfortable with. The drummer can say something like: "I agree that the guitar fits that part perfectly. On the contrary, I am not comfortable with the guitar. Can I play the piano instead? I find it easier."  

Final Thoughts ...

Being in a band is not unlike being in a relationship -- there will be highs and lows, but not matter how low those lows get, there are certain things you should never say no matter what!    

Your Turn to Sound Off!

What are some other things you should never say to a bandmate?

Let us know in the comment section below!

   

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